18 Signs You Have An Unexplainable Connection With Someone

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What exactly does it mean to have an unexplainable connection with someone? Does that mean you’re soulmates? Does it mean you should immediately start dating this person and elope to Hawaii with them? Or does it mean you’re crushing hard on a guy and getting a little ahead of yourself?

There are lots of terms used to define a connection like this:

  • Soulmate
  • Karmic connection
  • Divine connection
  • Soul connection
  • Twin flame

The good news is that these terms are all used to describe the feeling of being inextricably drawn to a person.

But let’s clear something up before we move on: a soulmate is not necessarily the guy you marry and live happily ever after with. A soulmate is someone you feel deeply connected to and who alters your life in an unforgettable way. They could be someone you end up romantically involved with, but they could also be a friend, a business partner, or a mentor. You might date for a few months or years and then go your separate ways. A soulmate is not necessarily forever; it might just be for Christmas.

What is a divine connection with someone?

What is a divine connection with someone?

Have you ever met someone and felt intensely connected to them, as if your soul has just recognized theirs?

It’s more than a damn you’re fine attraction. There’s an emotional and spiritual pull that you feel towards each other.

And if it is a genuine soul connection, you’ll often find that even if you try to run or hide from it, the Universe will find a way to keep reuniting you.

Can you feel a connection with someone you haven’t met?

Yes. It’s possible to feel a deep, other-worldly connection to someone you’ve only spoken to on a dating site, messenger app, or DMs.

But, and this is a big but: it’s very easy to confuse the rush of excitement of talking to a new guy you’re attracted to with the feeling of connecting to a soulmate. This is why I always advise the women in my Love Accelerator program not to let their connection become too deep with a guy before they’ve met face to face.

Here’s why:

  1. You have no idea he is who he says he is. You could literally be talking to anyone.
  2. You don’t want to become too attached to someone this early on before building some trust. This is why ghosting hurts so much.
  3. You’ve got to make him work harder to get to know you on a deeper level (this is part of what I call Little Love Step #5). Don’t hand yourself on a plate to anyone. You are not a breakfast buffet. You’re the expensive a la carte sh*t with mimosas and smoked salmon, okay?

18 signs of an unexplainable connection with someone

So, you think you’ve got an unexplainable connection with a guy different from anything you’ve felt before? Here are the signs to pay attention to.

1. The spark happens quickly

What does it mean when you feel an instant connection with someone?

You’ll meet them IRL or connect with them online, and a bond will start forming much quicker than it does with other people. Something about their presence puts you at ease or feels like home. Your conversations are just like the ones between old friends, and you can’t quite believe you only just met.

Remember, this is also part of how you get duped into thinking you’re in love with this guy you only just met, so be aware and keep an eye out for red flags.

2. You feel drawn to him like a magnet

Have you ever met someone you want to be around 24/7? This is common in the honeymoon phase of dating a new guy. You can’t get enough of them. You’re like a kid who got the triple scoop ice cream cone when you’re with him, and he’s all you think about when you’re without him. When you hang out in a group, you always gravitate toward each other. There’s no better way of describing it than an invisible magnet that pulls you together. You have an emotional connection that is so strong that it manifests as a physical attraction toward them.

3. It feels like you’ve met before

Have you ever met someone for the first time but had a feeling that you’ve met before? You’re racking your brain trying to figure out how you know them… did we hook up back in college, but it was so bad that we both repressed it from our minds? But you eventually realize that you don’t. Still, you can’t shake that feeling. So, you start to wonder, are past lives a thing? Did we know each other in a different lifetime? This is what’s often known as a karmic connection with someone. Your soul recognizes theirs. It’s said that a relationship like this will continue until you’ve learned what you need to learn from each other.

4. You can be yourself

Part of having an unexplainable connection with someone is the constant feeling that you can be yourself with them without needing to censor parts of your personality. You don’t feel any reason to pretend or embellish anything. You immediately get a sense that they accept you for who you are—every part of you, flaws and all.

We’ve all got our insecurities and quirks, but it’s these parts of you that he loves the most, and vice versa. You’ve never felt so accepted or seen because the truth is it’s rare to have a connection like this with someone, and it feels fantastic. Why can’t all connections be this good?

5. Being with him feels safe

You know how when you typically meet a new guy you’re attracted to, and you get fluttery butterflies in your belly? Well, a soul connection feels slightly different right from the get-go. Yes, you’re excited to see him, but there’s none of the nerves or anxiety you usually have wondering if he likes you or if you’re funny enough or smart enough or sexy enough. You feel safe and comfortable and held when you’re with him. This is important to pay attention to because it’ll help you determine whether this is just another crush or if it’s something deeper.

6. You want to know everything about him

couple on a date

Okay, it’s relatively normal when you start seeing someone new to want to know everything about him. Where he grew up, what his “type” is, whether he likes peanut butter jelly sandwiches as much as you do, etc. Why? Because you’re gathering information about him, kind of the way a detective or stalker does but in a non-creepy way, so you can decide whether you like them enough to keep seeing them.

But an unexplainable connection with someone is a little different. You don’t need to gather information to make an informed decision about whether you like him. That isn’t up for debate. You want to know everything about him because you’re genuinely interested in everything he does. To you, this guy is fascinating. You could stay up talking all night with him (you probably have), and you’d still be ravenous for more.

7. You share the same values

Even if you have an unexplainable connection with someone and you’re convinced you’re soulmates, it’s perfectly normal to argue and have disagreements. The difference is that you don’t argue about big things like values and morals and who voted for Trump. You’re on the same page when it comes to that heavy stuff. But you end up arguing over petty, superficial things like whether marmite is the best thing ever to be invented or who ate the last pop tart.

Even if you’re one pop tart down, the good news is you’re a pretty solid match which is vital for building a relationship that lasts.

If you’re not sure whether you’re aligned on the big things, take some time to create your love vision, so you know what matters most to you and can spot it when you see it.

8. You go together like mac & cheese

I believe that we are all whole on our own, without a partner, and it’s essential to feel that way as a single woman before you start dating; otherwise, you’ll always be dating from a place of lack. You don’t need a man to complete you.

But the thing about an unexplainable connection with someone is that it feels like you’ve been searching for them forever. They don’t complete you, but they add this beautiful, complementary facet to you that makes you shine even brighter. Even though you’re two different individuals, you fit together so well, which leaves you thinking that you might be one soul divided into two bodies.

And this isn’t just some kooky, out there new-age stuff. Science says that when you hit it off with someone instantaneously, your brains might literally be on the same wavelength.

9. Communication feels effortless

why do i feel a strong connection with someone

Does everything feel easy when you talk? You receive the perfect piece of advice at the right time, you understand each other without misinterpreting anything, you have a similar sense of humor, and you even use the same words. You’ll often finish each other’s sentences, and sometimes it can feel like you’re in each other’s minds.

Communication is something that many couples have to learn to navigate together because everyone communicates differently. So if you communicate without a hiccup from day one, you’ve got a rare connection here.

10. You are honest with each other

Trust takes time to build between strangers, but there are unique connections where you can’t explain why you trust each other so quickly, but you do. You’re both open and honest with each other and able to have intimate conversations about your deepest fears and dreams. This relates to the point earlier about feeling you can be yourself with him. A large part of this is speaking freely without worrying about how the other person will react. In most relationships, it takes time to build a foundation where you feel able to express yourself so honestly, but it’s there from the start with this guy.

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11. Silence is comfortable

This point is true in all healthy long-term relationships. When you’re truly comfortable in your own skin and with this person, silence will no longer feel painful or awkward. You’re not in silence because you’re one of those old married couples who have run out of nice things to say to each other. You’ve got plenty to talk about, but your relationship is so solid and special that you’re equally content spending time together in silence. It can even be enjoyable. And if that sounds bananas to you, maybe you just haven’t met the right guy… yet!

12. You read each other without words

Communication is effortless between you, but even when neither of you says a damn thing, you’re still weirdly in sync and reading each other’s minds. You just have to look into each other’s eyes, and you know. How?!

It’s all about your eye contact, body language, tone of voice, and energy.

Even when you’re not together, you might suddenly think about him or feel the urge to send him a message or offer support because you have an inkling that he needs you or he’s in some kind of danger. And when you do check on him, it turns out he was going through something the moment you felt it. Spooky, right?

You’ve never considered yourself psychic, but this connection has got you wondering if you could have a thriving career as the next Mystic Meg.

13. Being with him feels like home

couple staring into each other's eyes

You know how when you go on a big journey somewhere, and you’re traveling home, and all you want to do is walk through the front door, chill in your underwear, eat takeout on the sofa, and be surrounded by everything that feels safe and familiar? It’s not just your physical space that makes you feel at home; it’s certain people too. And when you have a deep, unexplainable connection with someone, they can often feel like home.

14. He makes you feel calm

Even when you’re in your most anxious, worried, troubled state, being with him feels like a soft breeze washing a calming potion all over you. And in that moment, everything melts away. Nothing feels as heavy as it did. Everything feels like it’s going to be okay. Even if you’re just talking on the phone.

When sh*t hits the fan, he’s the first person you go to, and he always makes everything better.

15. He changes you (in a profound way)

Another sign that you have a strong, unexplainable connection with someone is that they change you somehow, for the better. And you’ll start to notice this change within yourself. Maybe not at first, but eventually, you’ll look back and realize how much you’ve grown since you met. Perhaps you can’t quite explain how you’ve changed, but you feel that something has shifted within you.

This circles back to what I mentioned earlier about soulmates. They aren’t necessarily meant to be in your life forever (although they could be) but will help you learn a lesson and inevitably shape you.

16. Your connection feels more than physical

It’s easy to confuse lust for love, the same way it’s easy to confuse a soul connection with infatuation. One of the key differences is your connection will go far beyond the physical and become a deep, energetic connection. You’ll find yourself thinking about them when they’re not there, experiencing strange coincidences like thinking about them right as they call or text you, or having an intense (non-sexy) dream about them.

17. Everyone else disappears

What does it mean when you feel an instant connection with someone?

When you have an unexplainable connection with someone, everyone else in your world starts to become a little bit blahhhhhh. It’s not that everyone else is dull; rather, this person is so colorful and sparkly that everyone appears faded like an old polaroid. When you’re together, you don’t notice anyone else. Even when you’re in a Times Square-sized crowd, it feels like you’re the only people there because you’ve created this invisible bubble of energy that you’re existing in. And you’re content there. It feels like you don’t need anyone else. FYI: you do, so don’t drop all your friends like hot cakes for this dude—he might be your soulmate, but he’s still just one guy.

18. You won’t ever forget them

Whether this connection is temporary or meant to last a lifetime, you will remember each other. Not in a, man he was an ass*ole kind of way, but in an aww that was so special kind of way. So even if you break up, you’ll remember this relationship forever because it changed you and shaped you into the woman you are today. Even if he was your soulmate and you thought you’d be together your whole life, you’re both able to let each other go and move on while remembering the connection you shared in a happy light.

What to do if you have an unexplainable connection with someone (but you haven’t dated yet)

Feeling a strong connection with someone you just met but not sure what to do about it?

First things first, get clear on how you feel. Are you romantically interested in him? Does he match your love vision?

If the answer is yes, are you getting any signs that he’s attracted to you too? For example, does he frequently try to hang out with you? Does he compliment you a lot? Is he always there for you?

If so, don’t be afraid to put yourself out there and talk about it. Arrange to meet up for a drink and see if you’re a good match on a romantic level. You might both realize you’re better off as friends, but you’ll never know until you try!

What to do if you have an unexplainable connection with someone you’re already dating

Don’t let a connection develop too intimately online before meeting up in person. Talk is cheap, and it’s easy to say all the right things and have no intention of backing those words up with actions.

Remember to pace the progression of your connection with this guy (that’s Little Love Step #5) and avoid going too fast, too soon. Give yourself the time and space to see this man clearly and figure out if he’s a good romantic match for you in the long run. Continue to date other guys and keep your options open until you believe this guy is worth giving up your single crown for.

Have you ever had an unexplainable connection with someone you’ve dated? What happened? Tell me all in the comments below!

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1 year ago

He was my client in the hair salon. After the first haircut I walked up to the front desk and looked at my boss and said if I was single and he was single we would be together… Five years went by of a very innocent working relationship… He came in for a haircut one day and said he had left his wife and knew that I wasn’t happy and if I ever want to coffee he was available… Two weeks later I told my husband I had met somebody and wanted to pursue a relationship and couldn’t do it… Read more »

1 year ago

So true. Glad to see you’re talking about this. I’ve met several soul family and also my twin flame (he’s 22 years younger), and learned all this the hard way. One soulmate is a somewhat famous singer, and I’ve been his muse for years but that’s it. Had the telepathy and energetic connection with him to (so a TF dynamic) across an ocean. Wild stuff, and yep a woman can get super pathetic with these connections. Learned it all the hard way lol. Thanks Adam!

1 year ago
Reply to  Maya

Wow! So glad you shared this. I met a soul tie and he is 21 years younger. We have this unbelievable connection, but the age thing is really taking a toll on him.
He has a lot of shadow work to do and at this point I feel it’s better to keep my options open.

1 year ago

Ive been dating a man for three months i felt that immediate connection with…after our first meeting he said ” there’s no need to date others” i let it happen…we have almost all 18 except communication is not easy in text…he’s SUPER dry and stoic (complete opposite of me very im expressive feeling deeply every emotion) he teases me alot and i get anxious cuz i cant read him…once we connect verbally its good he tells me to relax… i want to make it work and have him consider my emotions more appreciate any advice on how i can ride… Read more »

1 year ago

Yes. It was like he mirrored all the things I was missing, lacking and craving for within myself. It wasn’t toxic, but it definitely was not a mutual connection. He helped me grow tremendously!!! We definitely were at two different places in our journey though. I felt safe, and at home with him when we spent time together. But unfortunately, He is still needing to heal. We haven’t seen each other in person in 4 months because I don’t feel he ever felt it, connection, attraction, anything, and I am focusing on others now, because there is no starting over.… Read more »

1 year ago
Reply to  Amy

Yes,Amy! Way to go.It is extremely hard to move forward when we have invested so much in one person and relationship. Kudos to you for knowing your value and not settling to be just another girl on his list. You deserve to be THE gal in someone’s life. It will happen. Know it. think about what it would be like with the guy that does feel the attraction, connection, and puts the work in to the relationship (and yes,chases you). Think about how you would feel in this scenario. Cheering for you!!!

1 year ago

What if you feel all these things but they don’t feel it back? OR vice versa? I have a man who has said almost all of these points to me. But for me, I can only check 3 or 4 of the boxes.

1 year ago

This is awesome! I feel all of these with the man I’m currently dating. The good news is, he feels the same way about me. Thank you so much for this biers important information. It puts my mind at ease.

1 year ago

About a year after getting out of a 3 year relationship, I recently met the most amazing guy completely out of the blue. We matched online and talked for about 20 days before meeting in person. Our online convo was sporadic and rather drawn out, as neither of us were very good about checking our messages if you asked me it was going nowhere. Then one day out of the blue we both happen to be online at the same time and he asked if I wanted to go to dinner that night. I am not normally one to agree… Read more »

Agatha Farkas
1 year ago

All these signs, were exactly what I had with a man I met while learning on lovestategies.com… the relationship was all what I wanted,, couldn’t be any better… knew instantly that the comfort, communication, butterflies, etc this was the the man I wanted to be with for the rest of my life. After 4 months, he suddenly passed away… I have his dog and she is my sweet reminder of him, but she is old and I am having to take care of her more now… I feel like I’ll never find someone I can feel close to again.

1 year ago

I feel a real connection but he doesn’t. Now what do I do?

Crystal Moreno
1 year ago

I asked the Universe Genie for a man with all of these attributes and I met a nurse out of the blue who had all of it going on, but he was working and going to school. . . I felt so many of these aspects. . We saw each other for 8 mo and then he decided to just completely move on. . . He has the personality of the warmest robot, I have the campaigner/champion personality, so I have a lot more feelings. . . Anyway, I realize he might only have been around when necessary to get… Read more »

1 year ago

I had a twin flame connection with a man towards the end of my marriage. We never dated or had a physical relationship. I knew him for 20 years, he has a car repair shop and he worked on my cars over the years. His wife died at 39 of breast cancer. We somehow stayed talking after I brought my new car to him because of paint defect. I do believe we had a telepathic connection. He was brought into my life to show me what was missing. My marriage was already on life support. After we talked I knew… Read more »

Manjula Dammanna
1 year ago

I’ve been struggling with this all year long. I met this man at work and I can’t seem to erase the connection. He is married so I’ve just been there to offer help and support. He is getting deployed for military for 8 months and all I do is cry all the time. I’ve made attempts to get together to see if we can have coffee or dinner but it always seems that he is focused on his children, family, and his job. So it’s been heart breaking. We’ve communicated and I told him I care about him but now… Read more »

1 year ago

I met someone last year and all of the things listed in this article happened. I was blown away that I felt the way I did, because it had never happened before. It also was unexpected. I wasn’t looking for it. Unfortunately the timing was off for him and we didn’t end up together, in fact he’s not in my life at all and I’m wondering how I move on? Everyone I’ve dated since has fallen short when it comes to that amazing connection and I refuse to settle for less than that so I push everyone away and I… Read more »

1 year ago
Reply to  Sara

I should add that he expressed feeling the same way. It was just bad timing.

1 year ago

I am with this person as a friend for 3 years. We dated for one. He keeps relapsing on drugs. He is an addict. It is killing me to see this. He got married in Feb. Filed for divorce last week. Because of his addiction. I want to help him, but don’t know how.

11 months ago

That’s awesome. My situation now need it. But, I can only check 3of the boxes.

11 months ago


8 months ago

I found the article on unexplainable connections to be quite intriguing. It’s always fascinating to explore the depths of human connection and the many factors that contribute
Speaking of connections, I believe there’s a connection between us and the environment that we often overlook. As someone who is passionate about reducing waste and preserving our planet, I recently wrote an article on “how to reduce household waste“. I think it’s important to remember that our choices and actions have a ripple effect, not just on those around us but also on the environment we inhabit.

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