11 Signs He Just Wants Sex: How to Tell He Isn’t In It For Love

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You’re starting to feel invested in this guy…and yet you find yourself looking for signs he just wants sex. You want to know now before you’re in too deep if there’s no possibility of a relationship.

The last thing you want is to fall for a man who has one thing on his mind.

Am I right?

So…does he want a relationship or just sex?

I’ll be honest: all men like sex, want sex, and will move mountains to have sex with you.

It’s in our DNA. Don’t blame me, blame evolution.

If this man is pursuing you in any fashion, he’s already thought about having sex with you in his mind about 25 times a day.

Although that may sound a little creepy to you, him wanting to have sex with you is not really a bad thing.

The bad thing is if he only wants sex from you…and once he gets it, he’s done with you…then you have a problem.

Not to worry, fearless lady. I’m going to help you decipher the signs he just wants sex so that you can decide what to do about it.

Your Coach,

Introduction

Just having sex with someone can sometimes be super fun…as long as both of you are on the same page in terms of this being a sex-only relationship. Having no strings attached means you get your physical needs met without having any of the work (or risk) of a relationship.

But since you’re here, I’m guessing that you’re looking for love and that you want to avoid a guy who just wants sex. Still, these men are out there, so knowing the signs that he just wants sex can save you a lot of heartache and headache.

1. He’s Extremely Social and Surrounds Himself With Women

bevy of beauties

A man surrounded by beautiful women may not want a relationship.

The sexual stereotype that we’ve all been fed is that she wants commitment and he just wants sex with as many people as possible. But a scientific study of the Makushi people in Guyana shows something interesting: this was only true when women were in high supply. When women were in short supply, men were more likely to be ready to commit.

The lesson here? If a man is surrounded by women (lots of female friends, at parties with lots of women), he likely sees the abundance as a challenge to conquer. That’s not what you’re looking for.

Now, certainly, a man who is willing to commit and be in an actual relationship with you should leave behind at least some of the women he formerly was around. I’ve always personally found that once I meet a woman I’m serious about, I cut ties with any other (insignificant) women in my life. But you can’t wait around and hope that this man will do that.

If you see a guy on a dating app and all his pictures show him surrounded by beautiful women, assume that he is exhibiting one of the signs he just wants sex.

2. Your Best Times are Sex-Related

When you think about the times you’ve spent with this man, you think, wow, we really have a great time.

But what are you doing when you have a great time?

Rock climbing?

Trying the best restaurants in your city?

Exploring museums together?

Or are you having a great time…in bed?

If you spend the majority of your time together having sex…or if your dates consist of delivery pizza or a quick trip to 7-Eleven…then I’m sorry to say…but he just wants sex.

Don’t believe me? Invite him out for a real date and see what his reaction is.

3. You’re Giving Him (Only) What He Wants

afternoon delight

If you’re only giving him sex, he doesn’t think he can have more.

Now, this is on him primarily, but you need to look at your own behavior too. If the only thing you’re giving him is sex, then how can you be upset that he just wants sex??

In order for a man to commit, he needs to get something from you that he can’t get anywhere else. Sex, he can find nearly anywhere. Your unique personality? Not so much.

If you’re moaning and groaning about how he’s not committing to you beyond your nightly romp, look to Interdependence Theory to understand why that is. This theory says that people commit to a partner to the extent that they are dependent on that partner.  What makes a man dependent on you?

  • Satisfaction. And not just sexual! If he gets many benefits without expending too much, he’ll be dependent on you.
  • Alternatives. He can’t get his needs met better elsewhere.
  • Investment. He has invested time, emotion, and energy into you.

If these aren’t happening, you’ve given him no reason to feel like he wants to commit to you and build a relationship. If you want something more, make sure you’re giving something more and not communicating that sex is the most important thing to you.

4. Every Conversation Turns Sexual

You: Boy, I’m tired today.

Him: Tired from all the sex we had in your dreams last night?

You: I need to pick up an eggplant from the store.

Him: You know what an eggplant looks like?

Another of the signs he just wants sex is when every conversation seems to turn into something sexual for him. He’s incapable of having a text or talk that doesn’t end up that way (kinda the equivalent of the whole that’s what she said meme).

Frankly, it’s exhausting and immature.

Why do men do this? I’m not really sure. It might be that they’re not confident and feel like they need to remind you of how amazing it is to have sex with them (they hope). Maybe they genuinely have nothing else to talk about. Either way, do you really want to be spending your time with this kind of man?

5. He’s in a Stage in His Life Where He Doesn’t Want More than Sex

don't want commitment

One of the signs he just wants sex? He’s out of the stage of wanting a commitment.

Consider where the man you’re dating…er, sleeping with…is in his life. If he’s between 26 and 33, he may have commitment and even marriage on the mind, but after that period, the chances he’ll marry begin to decline, and at that point, it’s likely he just wants sex.

If you really want to date a man with long-term potential, consider targeting men in this age bracket. Now, that’s certainly not to say that men this age always want a relationship, or that older men only want sex, but it’s something to consider if you’re seeing signs he just wants sex with every guy you’re with.

6. He Only Texts When He Wants to Hook Up

Stop and think about the last time this guy texted you first. First, what time of day was it? If he’s exhibiting signs he just wants sex, I’m willing to bet that he texted late at night.

Now, what did he text? Did he ask you about your day? Tell you about his? Share anything personal?

No?

Maybe it was more like…

Sup…

What you doin?

A man who can’t be bothered to hold a conversation with you via text (or even bother to call) and who only beckons you when he wants you is one that isn’t boyfriend material. And if you respond every time to his late-night text, you’re just giving him permission to continue this behavior.

The next time he texts looking to hook up, just ignore him. You deserve better.

Editor’s note: Ready to attract love with a proven strategy? Watch this free video to learn the 7 powerful steps

7. Your “Dates” Are Always at Home

netflix and chill

All your dates seem to be Netflix and Chill…should you be worried?

He’s not just into me for sex, you say, we go out all the time!

Okay, where does he take you?

Out for an Italian dinner…or drive-thru tacos so you can get home faster?

To the movies…or to his house for a Netflix and Chill session?

Dating requires going on — you guessed it — dates! And while there’s nothing wrong with hanging at home once you’ve been together several weeks or months, it should not be how you start out. Certainly, you’ll want to jump into bed with your boyfriend…but that comes after you’ve gone out and explored your city and gotten to know each other on dates.

8. He’s Too Focused on Your Looks

You should have seen the warning signs with his first Match.com message to you:

Damn girl, your curves are sexy!

You felt flattered, though, in reality, you would have preferred him to say something about your intellect and wit. Still, a compliment’s a compliment, you figured.

But…a woman can only take so many flattering comments.

Enough already! My body’s hot! I know!

Every woman likes being complimented, but if his focus is solely on your body, he’s not getting to know you at a deeper level…nor is he interested in doing so.

9. You Don’t Know Much About Him

mystery man

He’s deliberately keeping you from knowing him.

When you tell your best friend that you’ve been dating this guy for a month, she asks what he does. You hesitate.

Uh…something in law enforcement I think? Maybe a firefighter? Marine? Hm…

Then she asks if he has family here.

I think he mentioned a second cousin once removed…I’m not sure.

If after a few weeks you know little more than this guy’s name and what he looks like naked, that’s by design. He’s not trying to let you into his life.

He may see you several times a week. You may make each other laugh. But he’s put up a barrier that keeps you from getting too close to him. Because if you start having feelings for him, his access to booty is blocked and he’s got to start all over again with someone new (or move on to the other women he currently has in rotation).

10. He’s Conveniently Got Excuses Why He Can’t Hang with Your Friends

If you think you’re actually dating this guy, it stands to reason that you’d want to introduce him to your friends. And yet…every single time you bring up a plan, he has an excuse.

He’s out of town that weekend (though Instagram shows otherwise).

He’s sick (though Instagram shows otherwise).

He’s got the plumber coming (though Instagram shows otherwise).

If he keeps thwarting your attempts to introduce him to your friends, take that as one of the signs he just wants sex. He doesn’t want to do anything that reeks of “boyfriend.” Meeting your friends indicates that you two are an item, and he definitely doesn’t want to communicate that to them…or to you.

11. It Feels Almost Too Good To Be True

too good to be true

He comes off all Prince Charming…but is he?

He’s doing all the right things. Texting you. Complimenting you. Making you feel like a sex goddess. You really don’t think he’s exhibiting any of these signs he just wants sex.

So why are you reading this article?

Sometimes when things seem too good to be true, they are. You’re living in a fantasy world with this guy. That works for the first few dates, but after a few weeks, you both should be letting your hair down a bit and being more your authentic selves.

If he continues to keep up the Prince Charming act, it’s likely because he doesn’t want to let you into his heart.

Conclusion: If He Shows Signs He Just Wants Sex…

If, after reading this article and watching the video above, you’re nodding your head furiously saying, he just wants sex. How did I not see it before? let’s now address what you want to do next.

If you yourself only want a hookup, it’s not an issue. You’re both getting what you need from the other. As long as emotions don’t come into play, no one gets hurt.

However…

Because you’re a Sexy Confident Lady who reads the articles I write here about love and commitment, I think that’s not what you want. I think you’d love more than anything for this guy to change his Bad Boy ways and fall for you.

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but it’s not going to happen.

Rather than continue to sleep with this man and secretly try to win his heart, you’re better off cutting ties with him and finding someone who is ready for a real and open relationship. A man who, while he enjoys having sex with you, is looking for so much more. A man you can be yourself with.

One final note: while I never judge any woman for how soon she sleeps with a man, do realize that how soon you have sex with a man communicates certain things to him. If you sleep with him on the first or second date, he’s thinking, she’s down for hookups. Cool!

On the other hand, if you wait until you know one another better (even if you’re fighting off his and your raging hormones), you’re much more likely to have long-term relationship potential. You’ve made it clear that you are not looking for casual sex, and he will have had time to become emotionally invested in you.

And if you ask me…sex is better once you know each other more.

So talk to me. What signs he just wants sex have you noticed in the men you’ve dated? What did you do about it?

What do you think? Share your thoughts below...

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5 years ago

Thank you Adam. I’m 62 been on the dating sites for over two years. My spouse was 13 years older than me. He’s been gone 10 years . I’ve been through a lot of stuff with my spouse. I’ve met a few guys and your right most of them want sex. I’ve met a couple who have taken the time to get to know me too. I’ve been seeing someone for a year. It’s not always sex. We don’t live in the same place plus we both work shift work. We understand a lot about each other. I know he’s… Read more »

4 years ago

The guy I see brings me flowers and takes me out for dinner, he tells me he loves me, but when he leave I may not hear from him in a week, but he finds time to be on Facebook for hours everyday and I’m confused about if it is just the sex or if he wants more, as most of our time together we are having sex, i think he just says he loves me to get sex

Mia
4 years ago
Reply to  Brenda

Um ya obviously

rj
1 year ago
Reply to  Brenda

he only wants sex period

Falcon
1 year ago
Reply to  Brenda

Guys pull away often to regroup. All men want sex as a top priority.

Has he said “I love you”? Has he declared he wants a relationship with you? It’s a tough place to be in if you are not sure of him.

Whose he obviously social media with? Friends or women he’s trying to hook up with.

If you’ve been seeing him for awhile perhaps it’s time to find out what’s really going on and be prepared to exit?

Joan
5 years ago

Nice article! Decided to Google this because I’m tired of being used for sex. Looks like I’m the one who has to change. Thanks 🙂

P.S. signs I’ve caught were text conversations that always went sideways into sex (his doing), and the not wanting to go out on actual dates one.

Babu
5 years ago
Reply to  Joan

He usually talk about physical romantic things. I feel like he just want sex. That’s why I don’t flight to meet him. ( long distance relationship).

Sunshine
5 years ago

So, I met a guy in April and we started talking and he’s super sweet. We went on our first date, made out, he wanted to do more but I explicitly told him before our date I wasn’t looking for a sex buddy. He said he understood and we continued to talk. We’re both super busy and so our schedules got the best of us. He recently hmu again because he’s back in school so he doesn’t have to work as much. We went on a second date this past Monday and he invited me to his place (not the… Read more »

Sandra
5 years ago
Reply to  Sunshine

Hi Sunshine’, Your situation like mine. I met this guy on January and I like him so much. The chemistry between myself with him is a phenomenal. We so match in our career and our chatting are mostly about work and it was create a spark both of us. On second date, we went for movie and this guy asking to sleep at his house which is I’m refuse. He totally respect my my wish. He also know that I wanted to wait the right moment. We keep texting like everyday and talking about work. After several dates, I finally… Read more »

Precious
1 year ago
Reply to  Sandra

Guys can be very patient when they want sex, some can just give up pursuing you and others can be very patient, agree with everything you say you want and say that’s what they want too, say aal the right things just to get you in bed. I’m in the same situation with a guy I met back in December, I haven’t slept with him yet, but he always somehow finds a way to bring sex and my looks into the conversation. He’s never mentioned anything about my personality, how I make him feel or what he’d like to explore… Read more »

Warda
5 years ago
Reply to  Sunshine

Honestly, just run away from him.

Since you’re not giving him what he wants he’s simply adapting to you until he does get what he wants from you. Typical !
Also trust me, no one is ever too busy to text someone they really like so he might just be using excuses to keep you on the side while he’s texting other girls.

You deserve a man not a two faced idiot
Best of luck !

RJ LIN
1 year ago
Reply to  Warda

well said!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hollilanda
5 years ago
Reply to  Sunshine

I don’t see any mixed signals. He def likes you. 🙂 Mixed signals would be if he’s hot then cold. You see each other and have a great time then don’t hear from him much or he’s distant.

Sofia
5 years ago

That he only wants sex is something I already could handle. In fact was comfy for me to notice this early because I just wasnt expecting anything else. The ugly thing is he has just presented me to his other women (I mean the women he surrounds himself with) saying we have “known each other for a long time” and proceeded to engage me into a project with said women. And while I know he does this to make “us” fight each other or something (because now the other girls hate me) I am absolutely not gonna engage in such… Read more »

Mia
5 years ago
Reply to  Sofia

Whatever you do, DO NOT SHOW HIM ANY REACTION! He is after a reaction from you that will feed his ego bc his selfesteem is low. And go into the facebook group “High value women” They’ll teach you what to do and what to avoid.

Andra
5 years ago

Needing some advice! Male advice would be sincerely appreciated as well because I’m extremely confused haha. This will be long so if anyone actually reads it thank you lol!! I was out of town a few weeks ago and ended up meeting a guy at a restaurant. Hit it off really well, he joined me and my friends for some drinks. Throughout the night we were starting to hang around each other a lot and he was introducing me to all his friends. By the end of the night ended up at his place. He wanted to hook up but… Read more »

Mia
5 years ago
Reply to  Andra

Sounds like this guy is very into you. Introducing you to his friends, making sure you are satisfied and taking you out in public plus hanging although he was hungover are very good signs to me!

Alicia
5 years ago

I read your article, and I have been dealing with this same guy since I met him in 2006. When I felt he was being a jerk, I left and moved to another statute, only to realize, I hated the state I moved to. So after 2 1/2 years I moved back, low and behold it was like we were never separated…Fast forward to 2018, I have helped him out every time he needed a friend, and now that I need one and am staying with him temporarily he been verbally abusive and down right nasty towards me. We are… Read more »

Anna
5 years ago

Alivia sounds like you should go live with a family member or friend. Find a room to rent on Craigslist or somewhere else to live. He is mistreating you an you deserve better.
You deserve someone who show they care about you an value your worth.
Your a beautiful person an do not let yourself be subject to that type of treatment. Stay positive an I wish you the best.

Nicole
5 years ago

What about if you’re separated from your spouse and he says he doesn’t love you anymore and says he wants a divorce but he still wants sex? What does that mean?

Rebecca
5 years ago
Reply to  Nicole

It means that hes trying to have his cake and eat it too! Move on, his request to STILL have sex with you are totally out of line. Do not go from being the wife to a “fling”. Good Luck Girl

Cris
5 years ago
Reply to  Nicole

That means you should definitely get the divorce because no offense but he doesn’t love you anymore. You should also not have sex with him from now on because not only does he not love you but he’s decided you’re not worth anything but a good fuck and that’s just rude.

V
5 years ago
Reply to  Nicole

You know what it means. Sometimes people try to look so deeply for hope and potential amidst the obvious rejection. But in fact, it’s not complex, it means literally that. He just wants to have sex with you. And if you let him, he will take it and cease only when he meets someone he becomes involved with on a serious and intimate level… who he also potentially marry. Someone, anyone… just not you. Take the rejection gracefully and do what you need to do to move on. Travel, workout, go hiking, read a new book, spend more time with… Read more »

Thary Phok
4 years ago
Reply to  V

Beautifully said! When we work on ourselves in digging deeper to underlying issues that caused codependency, then we can heal and live our truth!
It should be organic instead of forced. The energy you invest in yourself will not go unnoticed and that energy draw individuals with same energy.

Thary Phok
1 year ago
Reply to  Thary Phok

Remove this comment

Falcon
1 year ago
Reply to  Nicole

It means he just wants sex.

Rim
5 years ago

Ma plz I nid ur reply….i hv a boyfriend whom I hv dated fr a year and some months now, but before we strtd dating I told him that they won’t be sex in the relationship which he agreed to…..and am in school and he stays far from mi which resulted us seeing anytime am on semester break……he refused introducing me to his siblings saying that they no me already but because I don’t want argument i let that slide, wen ever we have issues even if his at fault I still bring myself down to asknfor forgiveness just for… Read more »

Priya
5 years ago
Reply to  Rim

Rim dont worry ! i can understand your situation and u must come out of it as quick as possible coz if u are too much into him it will be very difficult to you to loose him and u will be too much obessesed for him . if he says he is busy ans not talking to you that much or else may be if u think he is avoiding You just leave him . guys like that character never fear of losing people , they just need a sex and then they will lose intrest .! just make… Read more »

5 years ago

Ok so I started dating this guy within a month. I feel red flags all over the place and it began when he showed up without an invite to a movie I attended alone. Then, I am out shopping and he was at my apartment waiting…again without an invite. He had food to cook, cat food for my cat (random brand) and other stuff. I had previous plans snd told him so and yet he shows up. I am a teacher and had told him yesterday that I would be busy with my son’s gf and working on school stuff.… Read more »

McKenzie
5 years ago

I need advice as well. I’ve been with this guy for a little over a month now. I made the mistake of sleeping with him one night when we first met (before even going on a date). We’ve be “dating” since but I feel like it’s just sex for him. He works a lot but to be honest I know very little about him. When I do ask him questions it’s always one word answers, I’m the only one ever suggesting dates (never even been on a date with him yet), the only time I ever see him is if… Read more »

Jo
5 years ago
Reply to  McKenzie

Hi so I have been chatting and texting a guy for 8 weeks (crazy time of the year and distance, we are an hour away from each each other and both have small children has made it difficult to physically catch up) we have talked about all things; family, our children, work etc we are planning to catch up for dinner for a first date in the new year. We’ve also had flirting moments with cheeky little sexy innuendos. My question is obviously, I won’t be having sex with him on the first date but what are the rules in… Read more »

Falcon
1 year ago
Reply to  Jo

When is the right time will be different for everyone, even with age. You have to make the decision for yourself as to what you are comfortable with. Set boundaries you need.

Prolife
3 years ago
Reply to  McKenzie

HE want only and only sex u will waste time with him cause when u will need him in serious things he will dissapear. My last relationship was only sexual i realised it after he made me pregnant when i was drunk and pushed me into abortion then he left me for other and again ghost me after one year but im not going to receibve him also this experience stoned my heart enough to wish myself to be forever single. So run before happen anything to regret the day u met him and fell for him.

Laura
5 years ago

I just loved this article u have opened up my blind eyes. I met a guy on 29th of December 2018 he asked to take me out for dinner and I couldn’t deny then later that night he asked me to go and see where he lives while we were there he tried to force me to kiss him but I refused he then asked me to be his gf I tried to reject him but on the second day I found myself saying yes believing that may be cuz he’s much older than I he won’t treat me like… Read more »

Zella
5 years ago

this guy asked me out, and it was good. we’d been talking about some really deep stuff before, and i really liked him. but i think i fucked up, because i slept with him on our second date, and now all he wants is sex. he won’t text me first, or want to meet up unless we’re in a private location where we can do stuff. please tell me if i messed things up with a guy i genuinely like by having sex with him so early in the relationship!

5 years ago

hi, I’m maycee and I’m 18.met this guy in school and he asked me to help copy his note and I helped out…I dropped my number on a note for him..a week later he called and when I asked who’s on the line he told me his name…I didn’t get his name on our first meeting..so I didn’t know who I was speaking with…I saw him outside the gate and asked him if he’s the one that called and he said no…while leaving to attend my next class he said he’s the one…he’s been bothering me to come to his… Read more »

I’m Not Putting My Name Here
5 years ago

I don’t want people knowing my name.

Okay, so what’s odd is I was actually looking at this to be sure I wasn’t only in my relationship for sex, not the other way around.
I always worry too that my lover may thing that, and luckily I don’t do any of that, or I think I don’t.

Thanks either way, I now know my lover doesn’t only want sex either.

Trish
5 years ago

So i met this guy on a dating site we talked for 2 weeks and then he decided to make the trip to me as i live 1 1/2 hrs away from him. I also made it known before we met that i am not and will not be a hook up girl and he agreed. When he arrived he kissed me and could not keep his hands or lips off me. I did make the mistake of sleeping with him on first meet ( broke my own rule) The following day he was up and outta my house my… Read more »

Mejumaa
3 years ago
Reply to  Trish

H

Mejumaa
3 years ago
Reply to  Trish

Hi to me I feel like he loves you ,coz in relationship men are not easy in opening about his life ,when a,man opens up his heart to u it means he cares and u have a place in her heart

Divine
5 years ago

please I’d love it if you reply in my inbox. I met this very rich dude on Facebook and we chatted for some months without seeing each other, when we finally met we had sex on the first day. and we didn’t see till almost a year before I saw him again and we had sex again. this guy is single but has a kid, tho he didn’t tell me but I found out myself. when I asked if he loved me he said”I don’t know about love but I really do like you and you’re a darling to me”.… Read more »

McKenzie
5 years ago

One of my co-workers set me up with her friend who is 31 years old with 2 kids. When we first met, we connected so well. He was so sweet by texting me every day going out and doing things. I don’t get to see him alot due to his job. He was once married and has 2 kids which are awesome. It was great when we first started to talk but noticed some red flags him talking to other girls liking their posts and pictures. I got jealous and asked him and he told me “I do what I… Read more »

Neila
5 years ago

Please help me for advise. I met a man when i was travelling. He is 28 and i am 23. We kissed on the first day we met , the second day we had sex. He keeps telling me he likes me because im independent , etc. We did travel together and had sex in the night. We only met for 6 days but until now he still contact me, but called me always late (at 11pm, ses like booty call)..he always asking me about my day, what i like and anything. But since we had sex to early, it… Read more »

Alegria
5 years ago

Life is messy Adam, so while I appreciate you writing on this topic I think you know you are being too compartmental, too neat. The reality is much more complicated, frustrating and puzzling. Men, in my experience, who want something from or with you/me/a woman will adapt their behaviour to what they think you want, or how they interpret cues from you. Some guys are very good at this, very experienced and great communicators and some are terrible. Some miss all the subtle signs, do all the wrong things and say the wrong things. Just because a guy is good… Read more »

Cai McLane
5 years ago

I started to read this and realized that most of these scenarios did not relate to my current situation. I’m hooking up with this guy that I met over the internet. We talked for a month and then decided to hookup on my birthday. The sex has been amazing and passionate but it leaves me wondering if I’m allowed to pursue other sexual relationship with other men. I’ve never had more than one sexual partner at a time but I know I’m not ready for a relationship at all. I’m working on myself and my career at the moment and… Read more »

Allison
5 years ago

Hello, I am 15 years old and I met a guy that is 16, Sophomore, and I am a Freshman. We were texting for about two weeks and we had really great conversations, and he told me that he started having feelings for me. We never talked about anything sexual or in relation to it at the time. I invited him to birthday party, and he was really hesitant at first and thought it would be awkward for him since he didn’t know any of my friends… but then later that day he decided he would come over to the… Read more »

Lina
4 years ago
Reply to  Allison

Hei Allison He seems a gentleman and open about his intentions. He says he dosent want comittment in the future( no merriage and no kids). He might like you and enjoy your company( sex), but you shouldnt settle for that. Men are simple to read. Liking someone because you are lonely og a younger girl showed interest in you is much more different than liking that person without reasons. Enjoy it as long as you want and do not over think or over fantasise about it. If you start having deep feeling for him, you should be honest with him… Read more »

Lina
4 years ago
Reply to  Lina

Sorry this was for Chelsea!
Cheers
Lina

Chelsea S.
5 years ago

I cheated on my boyfriend of 4 years to sleep with my boss. We’re 20 years apart. I was instantly attracted to him when we first met. I rarely saw him the first few months of employment, but around Nov/Dec, I was seeing him at least twice a week. Next thing you know, we’re sending flirty texts to each other. (He has met my boyfriend btw). While on a business trip, he slipped me his room key. I went to his room, where we shared our first kiss, but left before anything else could happen. The next day, I called… Read more »

Lina
4 years ago
Reply to  Chelsea S.

Hei Chelsea He seems a gentleman and open about his intentions. He says he dosent want comittment in the future( no merriage and no kids). He might like you and enjoy your company( sex), but you shouldnt settle for that. Men are simple to read. Liking someone because you are lonely og a younger girl showed interest in you is much more different than liking that person without reasons. Enjoy it as long as you want and do not over think or over fantasise about it. If you start having deep feeling for him, you should be honest with him… Read more »

Kate
5 years ago

He’s having almost all of these signs. I’m 17 and his 20.He just talks to me when we’re talking about sex and when I try to talk about other stuff he quickly says “nevermind ,take a pic I wanna see your body”.We’ve been together for years but we never realy had an actual relationship. The first time I felt like we are in an actual relationship was when he started reacting to my body. He knows that I love him as hell and can never let him go. And that’s the truth, even if I Find out he just wants… Read more »

Lina
4 years ago

Hei Adam I met this guy while traveling. We spent a week together talking and cuddling. I told him i wasnt looking for hookups and that there was no point in dating since we lives 5000 miles from eachother. We did not sleep with eachother because besides the reasons mentioned above I wanted to wait and see how I felt ab him, beyond attraction. Then one day he pressured me to be physical, I got very mad and ignorer him after that. Right before i left to go back home he gives me gult by saying I played him. I… Read more »

dazzy
4 years ago

Hi ladies , about 4 years ago i met this guy who i gave my phone number too, we started talking and we went on out often about a month later i slept with him..then vanish.Then he would call me like two weeks later i will give him a hard time about him vanishing i would play hard to get like for months and this has been going on for about almost 5 years.I have asked him what are we doing he said he stays quiet then i tell him i’m ready to just close this chapter and move on… Read more »

4 years ago

Hi, am Carena I’ve been dating this guy that I don’t know but we chat and talk on phone but before we started dating everything was working out well until I got attracted to him and westarted dating, when we started dating everything changed he hardly chat nor talk to me and most of the times he only talk about sec stuffs and even ask for my half nude pics. He told me he will see me when am on vacation but I realized he doesn’t love me and only wants to use me. Pls I need your advice

4 years ago

I also appreciated article, reinforces what I already know. Been seeing a guy for 7 months w a couple times I had to break off bc I was getting used. First 2 weeks of dating, were awesome. Slept together on 3rd date, sex has only gotten better and better. I started to notice several bad signs. I was under impression we both wanted a relationship. However, after about 3 weeks he ends things with me, no explanation, ices me out. Ok, I thought, bummer but we’re done. Then about week later he starts texting me close to weekend and usually… Read more »

4 years ago
Reply to  Kathryn

Does anyone know what it means when it says my comment is awaiting moderation?
Does need to be shorter?

Jeannette Molinaro
8 months ago
Reply to  Kathryn

It is going to be read by moderators first to see if the comment followed guidelines!

4 years ago

Does anyone know what it means when it says my comment is awaiting moderation?
Does need to be shorter?

4 years ago
Reply to  Kathryn

Do you mean mediation?
Like for PG content?
IDK just a thought.

Candor
4 years ago
Reply to  Kathryn

Mine is saying the same thing

4 years ago

I met a guy ,im sorry i even let him come aound me ,i,m an older woman my husband passed away ,i were being faithful to a man my dead husband of 12 yrs. So a guy came by wanting to be with me over a yr.ago he was a friend of family ,i would Always say no, so this summer 2019 he came around again wanting to be with me, me as an older woman getting older i say yes it was the best sex i ever had, so naturally i would enjoy the sex ,ge did say to… Read more »

Candor
4 years ago

Hi I’ve been dating this guy for two weeks. We kind of have a past and he liked me in the past but I just feel like he’s only interested in me for sex at the moment. He doesn’t text me much but he seems interested in my opinion. I don’t feel as special to him as I used to before and I’m worried that if I choose to have sex with him it might be the biggest mistake I’ve ever made. We started dating after he out of the blue texted me asking for a meet up and when… Read more »

Lee
3 years ago

Good and accurate – balanced opinion
Thank you Adam 🙂

Last edited 3 years ago by Lee
Christine Wilson
3 years ago

What is with guys that start a relationship and then ghost? I have had guys do this and then after some time they resurface and want to start back up. Is it because I don’t like confrontations and was not a Bitch when they ghosted me?

Kalvinder
3 years ago

Yes my guy only wants sex but I know a lot about him. The problem is that maybe I have not shared as much about me or maybe the reality is that I am not the high status woman he is looking for. I definitely was that when I married my exhusband. But my family broke up our marriage as he did not fit in with the quality of polite society my family belonged to. But my ex was an alpha male abd ended up fincisk controller of a private bank and lives on a carrabean island now with his… Read more »

Yasmen Edikarl
3 years ago

I met this guy in the university, 5 years ago, but recently we became super close. We began hanging out. On our second date , we had sex. We have been texting everyday since we became very close. He hasn’t spoken out loud that he is interested in me or in love with me , but I really like this guy. What do I do? Should I tell him I like him and ask how he feels about me ? Or how do I tell if he is really interested in me or keeping me to only have sex ?

Susan Alton
3 years ago

Narcissistic personality disorder….. hello!

Yasmen Edikarl
3 years ago
Reply to  Susan Alton

Well throughout the 5 years of friendship (which was just normal friends ) I was dating .. well I broke up with my boyfriend recently because his parents didn’t agree with our relationship because I was a year older than him. This guy was also equally dating so it isn’t as if we were best friends or that sort . I believe you may have long- friendship with some people , not necessarily being best paddies.. unfortunately I may not have bright out all the information for you to help me out with my judgement on this decision… We recently… Read more »

Yasmen Edikarl
3 years ago
Reply to  Yasmen Edikarl

And he is no more with his girlfriend as well due to some few misunderstanding between them. And it’s been a year since we both had our breakups .

Yasmen Edikarl
3 years ago
Reply to  Susan Alton

And he is no more with his girlfriend as well due to some few misunderstanding between them. And it’s been a year since we both had our breakups .

2 years ago

Hey bitch/asshole! Don’t write these kind of things.. I, myself am using my gf for her sexy body 😉

2 years ago
Reply to  PrinceCharming

Stupid Asshole!! Go fuck some whore!! Leave the poor girl alone!

2 years ago

Amazing!! Thank you! Now I can show this to my sister who is actually being used but she just doesn’t realise this..

2 years ago

IDK what to say………………………………………………………..

2 years ago

Go to hell

belle
1 year ago

i’m 13 and most of these fit my current boyfriend (14) which is really creepy

1 year ago

Well I know this guy and almost every time he texts me wya or sun or wants to come over and I tell them I haven’t moved out yet. And tonight it happened and I feel like the romance is gohn ever since I lied to him a lot so yea I feel that’s all he wants now so he just dropped me off but yea. I want him to be happy with me. And like me but it’s not there no more. It’s sad but imma. Or text him for a fire days and see what happens.

Jessie
1 year ago

Me and my man don’t do anything that couples do. No kissing hugging holding hands he even dont’ acting like we are together when we take our kids somewhere. The only thing we do as a couple is sex.

1 year ago

he never took me on a date he complains a lot I don’t know what he told my dad but he said my dad agrees with him he uses letting me live with him and how he’s paying rent and tired at work against me, he hates sharing with me he ignores me and thinks it’s funny too let me be upset when I was thinking about leaving he says do I want him to call someone to come get me I’m not happy but I keep trying all he wants me to do is suck him up and let… Read more »

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