How Men Think: One Simple Rule to Understanding Them

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Imagine, being able to crawl deep into the male mind to instantly understand how men think without them knowing it.

[SHUDDER]

IF that were possible, you’d probably need to go take a shower immediately!

Of course you can’t know exactly what and how men think, but it is still very useful to get a general idea of what’s going on in the head of a man you’re into:

Does he like you?

Is he using you?

Does he want a family?

Does he want to stay single and just hook up?

Being able to “read his mind” so to speak can help you understand if you’re aligned in what you want…or if you’re wasting your time.

Let’s crack that male mind open, shall we?

Your Coach,

Your Guide to How Men Think

I’m going to give you a very simple lesson in this article and video that sadly, so many of you women are getting wrong.

It’s causing you more pain and heartache than you could ever have imagined.

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And worse, it’s making everyone around you so frustrated because they can see what the guy you’re dating is all about…and you are blind to it.

Okay, I’m about to give you some crazy simple advice and you will be amazed that you didn’t realize it earlier.

Ready?

The way to know how men think is to stop listening to their words and start paying attention to their actions.

Whoa. Mind-blowing, right?

Actions Speak Louder Than Words

Pay attention to what he DOES, not what he SAYS.

What he does is a much better indicator of what he’s thinking than what he says.

You know the saying, “actions speak louder than words.” I’d like to rephrase that idea to say: “actions are the only thing that matter in that words mean nothing”…but I guess that’s not as catchy.

I just want you to really get this: his words mean nothing when his actions are the complete opposite. He can whisper all the sweet nothings he wants in your ear, but if he’s canceling dates or blowing you off, you’ve got to pay attention to those signals, not his words.

You’ll know what he’s thinking — how he feels about you — when he shows you he’s there in that emotional space with you. Ask yourself these questions to understand both how men think and what this man feels when it comes to his relationship with you.

Is He Making Time to See You?

When we like someone, we want to be with them, to spend as much time with that person as possible. A man who really cares about you isn’t just texting when it’s convenient…saying he’s swamped at work…or spending more time with his male buddies than you.

Understand that this is how men think. If he’s not really invested in you emotionally, he won’t make the effort to spend time with you.

Is He Opening Up to You?

via GIPHY

Vulnerability is a huge part of a successful relationship. In this case, it may be both actions and words that indicate how he feels about you.

His actions may be things like staying the night after sex when he used to leave right away. Introducing you to his friends. Inviting you to his house.

Wordwise, he may open up to you by telling you about his childhood, past relationships, hopes, and fears.

If he’s doing or saying these things, you can be assured that he wants you to get to know him on a deeper level.

Does He Trust You?

Just as important as vulnerability is trust in a relationship. Remember that trust is a two-way street: you may be so focused on figuring out if you can trust him (especially if you have a history of being betrayed in past relationships), but he is also figuring out if he can trust you.

How will you know if he does? Look for a lot of the signs that he’s being vulnerable with you as well as things like giving you a key to his house, leaving things at your home like his toothbrush, or taking a trip with you.

Is He Spending Time With You Outside of Having Sex?

If you’re enjoying life outside of the bedroom, that’s an indicator he cares about you!

This is a really strong signal for what men think: if you only see this man late at night and you do little more than have fun between the sheets and maybe a little pillow talk after, he’s not interested in being in a relationship with you.

On the other hand, if sex is just one component of what you do together, then he’s enjoying getting to know you as you go out to dinner, hike a local trail, or just binge old movies together.

Is He DOING Nice Things For You…or Just SAYING Nice Things?

This one is tricky. Understanding how men think means you have to accept that sometimes when a man seems to be nice, it’s to get something. Here’s an example:

Saying nice things:“Wow, you look really hot in that dress.”

Doing nice things: He surprises you with your highly-complicated coffee order at work.

The first, while of course is nice to hear, requires very little effort on his part. I’m not saying that every time a man says nice things that he’s not invested in you. But look at what he’s also doing. Is he making an effort to show you that he cares through thoughtful actions?

If so, that’s a way he’s communicating that he wants to make you happy because you make him happy!

Is He Including You in His Life?

If he’s introducing you to friends, he wants you in his life.

Another way his actions communicate what he feels about you is whether he is bringing you into his world. Has he introduced you to friends or family? Invited you to his weekly soccer match with the guys? Introduced you to his dog?

A man who compartmentalizes you outside of the rest of his life is one who isn’t looking for a relationship. But if he’s eager to include you in other aspects of his life, then that’s a great sign!

Conclusion:

Let me leave you with one final thought:

People lie, but actions don’t.

If his actions aren’t aligning with his words, tell him this: You are what you do, not what you say you’ll do.

He might not get that, but now that you’re an expert in how men think, you can wait to see if his actions start communicating what you want to hear. If they don’t, ignore what comes out of his mouth and move on. He’ll get the message that saying what he thinks a woman wants to hear (and not actually believing it or feeling it) is no way to treat a lady!

In the comments below, tell me an example of how a man SAID one thing but DID another. What was your response?

What do you think? Share your thoughts below...

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Meg
5 years ago

How can I know his into me when its a long distance relationship?

Lila
4 years ago

Adam ,
Actions speak louder than words was so true and you hit the nail on it’s head.

4 years ago

THIS is why I have a male coach!!
Thanks Adam!!

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