6 Qualities that Men Look for in a Wife
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Notes from the podcast
6 Qualities that Men Look for in a Wife
In our latest podcast, we tackled a potentially touchy topic: what makes someone “wife material.” Now, before you react with outrage or curiosity, let’s delve into what we mean. It’s really about what it takes to be a lifelong partner (for men or women). We’re two married guys with incredible wives, and we’re sharing the qualities that made us realize our wives were what we wanted in lifelong partners.
Two Types of Women?
We’ve all heard it: “There are two kinds of girls – ones you fool around with and ones you marry.” This statement probably brings up two thoughts:
-Indignation: “How dare guys think like that? Who do they think they are?”
-Curiosity: “What are the criteria? Which one am I? How do I know?”
To shed some light on this, we’re breaking down the key qualities that made us recognize our wives as true partners for life.
1. A True Equal
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A woman who is wife-material is someone who meets you at your level, if not exceeds it. This means:
-Bringing Their A-Game: The low-effort tactics that might work on other women won’t cut it here. We had to be at our best, and so did they.
-High Value and Character: Smart, respectable, and special. These women stand out due to their unique qualities.
-Independence: They’re not clingy or needy. They have their own lives, interests, and goals.
2. A Rock
Not Dwayne Johnson, but someone who embodies:
-Reliability and Stability: They’re consistent and predictable in the best ways.
-Nurturing Nature: Kind, caring, and low on neuroticism (emotional instability is a relationship killer).
-Easygoing: You might see guys with chaotic types, but they’re not looking at them as long-term partners.
3. A Consigliere
Just like a trusted advisor:
-Great Listener and Communicator: They offer wise counsel, ask insightful questions, and genuinely listen.
-Challenge and Support: They push you to improve and support you unconditionally. They’re your best friend.
4. A Swiss Army Wife
Versatility is key:
-Multifaceted: They can be fun and serious, combining humor and gravity.
-Balanced: Mature yet youthful, responsible yet spontaneous. They’re comfortable in both formal and informal settings, from galas to dive bars.
5. A Sanctuary from Turmoil
Life can be chaotic, but they provide:
-Calm and Comfort: They bring a sense of peace and stability.
-Problem Solvers: They’re not adding to the stress but helping to alleviate it.
6. A #1 Fan
Everyone needs someone who believes in them:
-Supportive and Encouraging: They see your potential and remind you of your best self. They’re your biggest cheerleader, balancing out self-criticism with belief in your abilities.
Conclusion
These qualities aren’t about fitting a mold but about finding someone who complements and elevates you. In our wives, we found true equals, rocks, consiglieres, versatile partners, sanctuaries from turmoil, and our biggest fans. If you’re wondering where you stand, consider these qualities not as a checklist but as traits that foster a healthy, balanced, and supportive relationship.
Beautifully stated and straight on all positive, research points. Truth in the bag.
Nice article. I lost the love of my life,34 years of sharing, caring, supporting each other through good & bad times, we were equals in many ways, which including raising children, similar morals & values. We were definitely soul mates. How do you find another soul mate much later in life?
How do men and even women feel when they realize the intelligence quotient isn’t on even ground? My guy is wonderful in so many ways, but I get frustrated when I realize there is a big discrepancy in our intellect.
My question is,would they say the same things about YOU? ID love to hear from your wives about how YOU measure up to their standardsfor emotional intimacy, emotional maturity and intelligence, as well as the other practical things like problem solving and support. I wouldnt want to be someone elses rock unless he were also a rock for me as well….
On the Flip Side This is what I should be looking for in a man.
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I think I failed the test and now it’s too late. Wish I had known this before