4 Ways to Get Over a Breakup & Find Closure
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Let’s be honest, breakups suck. They’re one of life’s most painful experiences, but they also remind us that we’re capable of love and connection. And that’s something to be celebrated.
In this post, I’m going to share four exercises that can help you give yourself the gift of closure and move on from a difficult breakup.
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- Write a Letter (But Don’t Send It). One of the most cathartic ways to process your feelings is to write a letter to your ex. Pour your heart out, expressing everything you’re feeling. But don’t send it. This exercise allows you to get your thoughts and emotions out without the fear of judgment or response.
- Research the Benefits of Getting Out. There’s a reason people say to “go out and have fun” after a breakup. Getting out of the house and socializing can be a powerful way to boost your mood and distract yourself from negative thoughts. Research has shown that engaging in activities can help you organize your thoughts and process your emotions.
- Write a Letter from Your Ex’s Perspective. This exercise can be particularly helpful if you’re struggling to understand why the relationship ended. Imagine what your ex might say to you if they could express their feelings honestly. This can help you gain valuable insights and perspective.
- Reflect on the Relationship. Take some time to reflect on what didn’t work in your relationship. Create a bulleted list of the issues that contributed to the breakup. Referring back to this list can help you avoid repeating the same mistakes in future relationships.
Remember, finding closure is a personal journey. There’s no one-size-fits-all approach. These exercises are simply tools to help you process your emotions and move forward. Give yourself time, be patient with yourself, and seek support from friends, family, or a therapist if needed.
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Adam–you are brilliant. I already did #1, a nastygram that I won’t send him but basically encapsulated all the venom I was feeling towards him. I’ll work on the rest, and I know it’s just what the doctor ordered so I can move on. Thank you thank you thank you!
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Doesn’t work. I’ve done these things, and you can feel ok during the day, but at night your brain knows you have just made this all up, and it’s not necessarily truth, so the brain never settles through it without truly hearing the truth from him. I’ve had closure from men in all my previous relationships and have healed very well. No closure from this last one and nothing I do on my own truly heals deep inside the brain. Ultimately our brain is too smart to be tricked.
The brain is the dinosaur of our bodies. The heart is actually the ruler/leader, not the brain. Try placing one hand on your head, and the other hand over your heart to restore heart-focused energy. The heart is what needs healing. The brain may be fabricating thoughts/ideas as a way of protection, inadvertently preventing you from healing.
Be honest in every word so that the Merge Fruit other person feels safe and absolutely respected