10 Harsh Truths about Dating Men You Wish You Knew Sooner
Notes:
10 Harsh Truths About Dating You Wish You Knew Sooner
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Do you have someone in your life who’s willing to tell you how it is? Typically the role of a best friend (or spouse), everyone needs a reality check from time to time. While this “tough love” may sting a little, it ultimately comes from a place of care and a desire for what’s best for you and your future relationships.
These are 10 harsh truths about dating that you wish you had known sooner:
1. You’re Complicit in What’s Holding You Back: You’re part of the problem, so figure out how you’re self-handicapping or creating obstacles that make achieving your goal harder. Identify what you’re unwilling to do, as that’s likely what you need to do to broaden your comfort zone.
2. Are You Really Ready for a Relationship? The first step is focusing on yourself. Don’t use relationships to fix yourself or fill in the parts of you that are incomplete, flawed, or broken. That’s not fair to a potential partner.
3. Exercise Enhances Attraction: Do it for yourself – it makes everything better, from your mental health to your confidence. Plus, it’s a great way to meet potential partners.
4. Leaving Your Love Life to Fate is Foolish: Love won’t just find you. You can’t find a partner from your couch. You need to put in the work.
5. You Need to Be the Person You Want to Date: If you want higher-quality partners, you need to be a higher-quality person. Would you date you?
6. Dating Can Be Hard, But Being Lonely is Hard Too: Choose your hard. Surround yourself with knowledge, support, and expertise to make it easier.
7. Some of the Problems You Blame Are Just Excuses: Other people where you live are finding partners. Not all men are terrible, and online dating isn’t fatally flawed.
8. Staying Mad at Your Ex Keeps Them Close: If you really didn’t care, you wouldn’t bring them up. Holding onto an ex holds you back from finding your person.
9. Is He Pulling Away, or Are You Pushing Him Away? You might be too needy or too guarded, causing him to run.
10. If What You’re Doing Worked, It Would Have Worked by Now: What’s the definition of insanity? How much more time are you willing to waste doing the easy thing instead of the hard thing?
“Stings from a friend are more valuable than kisses from an enemy.” Paraphrased from the Bible by God
This was so very helpful. Thank you for the tough honesty. Yes!
thank you
I think this is a great topic and I follow you both. The advice you give us is current and relevant. I was a married woman for a long time so dating in this current environment was daunting. Now, 3 years post divorce, I’be finally developed a better understanding of what I want and I’ve let go of the outcome. As a sales professional, you always know that “hope” is not a strategy for driving results, but it’s a series of metrics that help you achieve those results. So, the advice I’ve given to myself is the following: Develop a… Read more »
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Some of those things mentioned was me. I would give it a five star!
I found the pod cast very interesting. I found out a lot about myself and how I am sabotaging my self. I have many
Things and actions I need to improve! Thanks for the suggestions!
Loved and resonated with everything said here… None of it is actually harsh when you take responsibility for your life… These are just true and encouraging reminders to help you get going and refocus on your actual priorities.
I really appreciate. It saved me a lot of time and helped me feel ready to move forward.
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